LynnMarie’s Memoir will be released in March of 2016 on Post Hill Press. Please sign up for the mailing list if you would like info on how to order an advance copy or get a sneak preview of the book!
In case you missed it, here’s my interview with Bobby Schuller on Hour of Power that aired over Mother’s Day weekend.
I LOVED playing my accordion in church! Amazing to me to see how God puts all the pieces together!
I nodded, which was the signal to my veterinarian to go ahead. I watched as he pushed the plunger full of sodium thiopental into the I.V. in Fido’s leg. I held on as tight as I could and cried as I whispered into Fido’s ear, “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry!” Then, the doctor pulled Fido out of my arms and I collapsed onto the floor.
My heart hurts today, even though it happened six months ago. But today is Fido’s half birthday, and we celebrate half birthdays in our house. So I’m remembering him and feeling the pain of that dreadful morning all over again. I share it with you not for sympathy but because I know that it is in the telling of what hurts us that we can continue to heal. And I need a bit more healing. It’s only when we are open and raw that light and fresh air and comfort get in. It’s spring and the flowers are blooming and coming back to life, which is what I feel like my heart is doing just a tiny bit. We all made it through the winter. Fido would have been 9 1/2 today, if I hadn’t had to put him to sleep. (more…)
Hey. I know how scared you are right now. I know that your heart is beating a million times a minute and you are holding back buckets of tears. I know that you wanted this moment to be so much more than it is and much more than this picture captures. I know that when you saw and held your son for the first time you wanted to feel love and joy, but instead you felt nothing. And I’m so sorry.
But you know what, it’s all going to be okay. I know you can’t see it now, because you’re covered in pain, but one day your going to love him. One day, after you dig deep into your own soul and learn about your self and your brokenness your going to discover that what you are longing to feel, the connection you so desperately desire, is called unconditional love. And the little boy wrapped up in the blanket came here to teach you all about it.
But he couldn’t do if he came here like all the other little boys. He would have to be different. God gave your son something extra. In order to save you, he’d come to this world with Down syndrome. (more…)
In October 2014 LynnMarie was invited to speak at the Ascend Woman’s Conference in Pasadena, California. You can watch her appearance here.
The lady in the aisle at Party City held up the Superman costume and in an intense southern drawl said, “Isn’t this the cutest thang? My little boy is going to love trick-or-treating in this! What is your child going to be?” She had no idea that she was about to get punched. She had no idea that standing next to her was a mom, a Northerner, an ego-centric artist, who was full of so much anger, bitterness and fear, that she was about to punch her square in the face.
That was a few years ago, and I didn’t hit her. In fact, I should find her now and thank her, because from that moment of frustration eventually came insight, healing… and a song.
My son James is eight-years-old and has a dual diagnosis of Down syndrome and Autism. I’m slowly getting better at accepting his disability. Slowly. It’s an on going daily process, where I try to remember to let go of my fears, live in the moment, and say my own version of the serenity prayer; Help – Ok – Uncle – Help. But sometimes Superman outfits and Halloween still make me sad. (more…)